It was a common theme with me and my friends when you are getting out from university, that you seem lost not knowing your purpose. Having all your life with goals and path laid already, which basically is to study and graduate, while taking extra curricular and stuff. Then once you graduated nobody tells you what to do anymore. Now we have to answer the ultimate questions: Who am I? What is my purpose in life? What do I want to do or be?
Fortunately all these questions are answered as time goes by.
Without realizing we finally hits 30s. Moreover with COVID the past 2 years seemed to wasted away already.
As you get a good grasp on who you are, what you like, and what you want to pursue in life, be it in relationship, career, or else, life never cease to challenge you. Now the struggle is no longer answering questions of what, but how. How are you going to find your way towards your goals?
Add to that is the difference in circumstances. As friends are finding their own paths, it is no longer easy to hangout or call on a whim. We need to plan ahead and it gets even harder the more people you are trying to gather. Another challenge is finding someone who shares your struggle. You met your once close friend and tell stories. They listened but having difficulties understanding what you are going into.
In short, it become apparent that having a strong social support in 30s are very important and needs efforts to maintain it. Because people are no longer being flocked into a classroom with similar age and common goal.
The second thing to address is that we have not only getting accustomed to whatever we do, but also being involved for so long that we often get stuck into a routine. And not all our routines contributes to our purpose in life. Perhaps you dream of a life full of traveling but now you are stuck in a 9-5 job. Or you want to pursue higher education but you have little kids who you can’t leave alone.
Maybe you managed to find some time aside but you are too exhausted because you only have so much energy to spend each day.
Again, the challenges are now all about answering the how questions.
On the positive note, it’s not all doom and gloom. Because the answer to your struggles will be answered as time goes by, as it was during the 20s. It’s the time we need to trust to.